Dating Woes from a City Living Millennial

Dating is difficult. Not just the motions of dating, but actually meeting quality men. My dating life has been quite colorful, to say the least. I’ve been “hooked up” by friends with this “awesome guy”. I have met countless guys at the bar, the gym, and on the subway. None of these men lasted so it was time to try something new. I took the advice of my girlfriends and women on the internet and tried my luck with a few right swipes. I decided to give you all the rundown of my dating woes or should I say adventures.

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So this is where my dating app story begins. While visiting a good friend in the Bay Area, she was raving about her dating success on this app that really vets the guys to ensure they’re decent human beings. She then tells me how hard it is to get on the app due to the vetting process and the lengthy wait time. I had never tried a dating app, but at this moment she had me sold. Of all the dating apps, The League has been the most successful. I’ve met quality men who are good “daters” although they usually aren’t looking for anything serious. I appreciate their honesty and ability to communicate.

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My sense of control needed this app. He swipes. I swipe. We both like one another, but I lead the conversation. Having the choice to start a conversation with potential suitors made me feel more comfortable with using a dating app. However, I found the caliber of men on Bumble to be pretty lame and only interested in hookups.

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And this is where my dating app story ends. A guy friend of mine shared his success on OkCupid so I figured it wouldn’t hurt to try. Well, this isn’t the first time I’ve been wrong. OkCupid is a proven example of “pay to play”. My guy friend also failed to inform me that he was paying for a membership. The selection of “free men” fell in the reject category and I was not about to cough up any coins for a paid dating app membership. I’m not desperate… yet lol.

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You would think meeting guys in real life would be a lot easier. NOT! These are the biggest creeps. Their approach is usually flawed and their follow up is even worse. Bar connections are usually the best, to be honest. It’s a social setting where people go to meet others so it’s completely normal. Unlike meeting someone on a subway train which is totally awkward when you’re wearing headphones so people don’t approach you. Then you have nosey bystanders all around who make it their business to be in yours. Pretty much, #IRL is pretty difficult and not always the right or place.

After all my datings wins and losses with various apps and #IRL, I’m going with in real life moving forward. While it can be awkward, I’d rather see it head on than via phone screen. There is something more tangible and magical to meet a guy, chat it up and either give him my number or send him on to the next woman. Best of luck to you new age daters who prefer to swipe right or even left (it’s okay not to like everyone!). May the dating force be with you!

*Disclaimer: I briefly tried Tinder, but it wasn’t worth discussing because I believe it’s trash. WORST GUYS EVER!